How do you decide what's best for your kids?

I had a friend ask me something about a local school the other day. I warned them that I had opinions if they were ready for them. They agreed, and I gave them my thoughts. It can be overwhelming when you're kids about to start school and live in an urban(ish) area where you have choices. It's overwhelming because you want what's best for your child when you're faced with options.

Additionally, there are great and not-so-great campuses when a district is large. Knowing where to look and how to see what the campus looks like can be tricky. Where my kids go to school, the campuses are all open, meaning just because you live by a school doesn't mean you have to take your child there. In this blog, I want to share what I did for my kids when the time came for them to start school. Now, I want to set the record straight that the goal is not to speak ill of any school, but you have the right to advocate for your child.

That's my first rule, do not feel bad for not liking a school. The culture fit of your child there is super important. Often, if not always, the culture is set by the principal. You can tell what that is like even before the school door opens. I have pulled up to schools where the principals had designated parking spots. While that might not be a big deal to you, it tells me that they think they are critical. Much too important to have to park with the other teachers. Then you can tell how the office staff greets you, are they warm and genuine, then you know that they are happy in their jobs.

I used THIS DATA (click on campus to search by campus) to see how the schools were getting their kids to the next level. I identified four schools that I thought would be good for my kids. Now, some of you might want to look at magnet programs, private schools, or even charter schools. All are options, but they were not the right fit for my kids. Often, these schools lack resources if you're child needs accommodations. I am dyslexic, so public school was the better option in preparation if my kids needed that.

How did I determine the 4 to look? I asked people who had kids at different schools' thoughts. I was shocked to hear people say, "Don't put your kids here." Others said, "We love the leadership, and their teachers have all been here forever." Still, others said, "I like it. My kids are challenged and have classmates that are very different than they are." I also wanted my kids to be in diverse classrooms, so I identified Title 1 schools with an eclectic socioeconomic mix. I then looked at what campuses were within an easy to accommodate distance from me. It became clear which were feasible.

Then I called each campus and set up a tour with the principal. This is so important. You can also tell about the culture by how smoothly this goes after making the appointments (in the spring semester). I pulled the above reports again and began to think of questions I could ask them. I identified five questions that came out of the data. "What is the biggest struggle for this campus?" "What do you do well?" "How do you get all the kids to success?" "What's your leadership style." "I noticed your campus was above/below on math/reading/science what are you doing to keep/improve this."

Next, I showed up to the tours and looked for the things that weren't said, but spoke volumes. I walked into one campus, and the principal met me at the door. I loved that. I watched to see how the students interacted with the principal and in the hallways. Honestly, you can tell when a principal is running a prison vs. facilitating greatness. Some principals knew every kid's name; the kids hugged them when they saw the principal. Others were annoyed or agitated by the students and saw them as nuisances. I appreciated when a principal stopped talking to me and addressed a student, which showed me they are student-focused. You will know the things left unsaid when you see them. I honestly hadn't planned that to be a big part of the tour, but I do really think you can see those things well.

That's it. I chose a school, filled out the transfer form, and followed up with an email to all the principals thanking them for their time. Also, I was nervous about doing this, and I hated calling and setting the tours up, but I kept thinking if my kids were going to spend most of their day at this place, then it was worth the perceived embarrassment. I think, at the end of the day, you have to trust your gut and let yourself be ready to see what you might not want to.

I am no magician. My kids got into a school that was perfect for them. I am not anything special, but the schools want parents who are involved, so I know that it helps when you appear to be an involved parent.